Playdates and Parties During a Pandemic?

Playdates and Parties During a Pandemic?

safe playdates covid19

We are all restless. We have been staying at home for weeks and the grocery store has been our biggest adventure. But now that SAHOs are being lifted across the country, kids (and parents!) are eager to start meeting up with friends. The big question —> Is this safe? 

With what we know today, my opinion is that getting together with friends for playdates and meet-ups is certainly possible (Yeah!) There are ways to do this more safely, based upon your local infection rates and personal risk factors. The goal for everyone is to enjoy some time together while limiting higher-risk behaviors that could increase the chance of getting sick.

First, a bit of backstory. As SAHO are lifted, the virus is continuing to spread. Therefore, as we begin to step out of our homes, our personal risk of infection is only increasing. Research continues to support that our risk of infection is based primarily on a combination of two factors: the number of viral particles to which we are exposed (N) and the duration of time in which we are exposed (T). As we start to interact with one another, we can use this information to stratify our personal risk within our community; making safer choices based on our own concerns and situations.

Here are some thoughts on safer playdates during the pandemic: 

Keep it outside. When we are outside, we limit factors N and T by diffusion. Viral particles are quickly swept away by the breeze, limiting time of exposure and viral load and decreasing infection risk. Experts continue to support the great outdoors as a safe space for recreation and relaxing. Of course, in densely population areas (read: NYC) this theory has been challenged. That’s why physical distancing still matters. Keep reading. 

Kids need to be able to maintain physical distancing. Research is early and inconclusive regarding how children spread the novel coronavirus. We simply don’t know how likely it is that kids can silently exchange the virus among themselves, subsequently bringing the infection back home and infecting everyone else. What we do know is physical distancing has slowed the spread of the virus as a community. Continuing this distancing behavior remains key to keeping everyone safe until we know more. 

Think of your ten. Many communities are basing re-opening plans based on a maximum group number of ten people. Bear in mind, there is no research that supports ten being a “safe” number. The point of “ten” is to offer a benchmark to restrict mass gatherings, essentially limiting factor N if one member of the party is spreading the virus, and to facilitate more manageable contact tracing should one member of the group become ill.

Practically speaking, I think the “Rule of 10” is more applicable to ten or fewer members of 2-3 households gathering together. This is of lower risk than the co-mingling of ten individuals from ten different households. In addition, the greater number of children that gather together (toddler and teens alike), physical distancing will be harder to maintain and group thinking may prevail. Until we know more about how well our kids can manage safer interactions with their peers, limiting meet-ups to 1 or 2 friends is a safer choice. Or, choose to play with a few kids from one household. 

Keep it short. Rather than all-day-play marathons, consider a start/stop time for initial meet-ups. This will help to control factor T. Assuming some children are asymptomatic carriers of SARS-CoV2, but impossible to identify, limiting time of interaction will decrease risk of infection. 

Supervision will be needed. Kids have been cooped up. They are excited to get out. The reality of how we can safely interact with our friends is totally new. Being present to observe how your child is able to safely play with peers will be important during the first few playdates with friends. Bonus: You get some outside time, too. As you observe your kids under these new circumstances, you can determine the level of supervision that will continue to be required. Obviously, younger kids will need more consistent observation. Older kids may be able to be more responsible on their own. 

Choose non-contact activities. Walking around the neighborhood. Riding bikes. Sidewalk art. Kicking a soccer ball. Sitting and chatting. Scooter races. Fishing. Tennis? Golf? These are all activities that can be reasonably shared among friends with limited contact.

Hold off on the snacks. Have you seen this video of how easy germs spread when food is shared? Granted, these results may be inflated among otherwise conscientious adults, but could you imagine this video if elementary-aged children were involved? I get nightmares. The point is that sharing food also shares germs. If snacks are needed during a playdate, be sure that kids stop to wash hands well before eating and BYOSnack. 

Hand sanitizer and hand washing for the win. We can’t forget the basics. When we are out and about, hand sanitizer should be going with us. When we come home, a good 20-second scrub with soap and water should happen before anything else. 

Don’t let your child play if they are sick. Because don’t be a jerk. 

Maybe not everyday or everyone? I wish we had better ways to identify well-appearing individuals who are spreading illness or the ability to identify those of us who have antibody protection against the virus. Right how, we just don’t. Since it takes 3-14 days to develop symptoms after getting infected, multiple playdates with multiple different people for multiple days in a row feels unsafe. Take it slow. Add a few friends to your circle of contact at a time. Allow some space between visits. I know this is a highly conservative and likely unpopular approach. But it is something our family is considering, since our risk (and therefore our kids’ risk) is slightly different with both my husband and myself being frontline healthcare workers. 

Should my kid wear a mask? When kids play outside, they do not need to wear a mask. Facial coverings are recommended for all people over the age or 2 years if physical distancing is going to be difficult or in enclosed areas. 

What about visiting grandma? Our community members over the age of 65 years of age remain in the highest risk category of death from COVID-19. If your family is considering a visit with grandparents, be sure to have honest discussions about expectations. Everyone should be feeling well. Best practice is to maintain safe distance. Outside visits are better. Consider arranging a visit with only one household group at a time rather than any large gatherings. But if grandparents have any chronic health conditions, it may still be best to continue virtual visits only. 

Medically complex children? If your child is medically at risk, household members should continue to limit movement to essential activities only. As SAHO are removed, the risk to everyone in our community will go up. Until your community shows a decline in cases, caution remains high. 

Sleepovers? Not yet. 

If your community returns to SAHO, then no playdates and no parties. Under SAHO, your local public health officials have deemed it unsafe for interactions outside of essential visits. Our friends are essential connections, but not essential visits. This reminds me… Visits to your pediatrician for both wellness and illness care ARE essential throughout the Pandemic. Pediatricians everywhere have modified offices and protocols in order to safely continue medical care for your children for the months to come.

Bottom line: Creating an environment that limits transmission risks is still the goal. It takes us, as parents, to define the boundaries we feel are acceptable for our families. As summer passes and we continue to know more about transmission and our personal community response to the virus, restrictions and recommendations will change. For now, starting slow will allow us to see how are children will be able to play together in this new era, while making it possible to adjust and adapt if we feel the risk is getting too high. We’ve got this. Together. One step at a time. 

A note to the reader: Thanks for getting to the bottom of this post. As you consider my take, please know that I understand my voice is simply one of many. My intent in sharing is to explain how I am navigating this shifting situation for my own family, as well as what I am discussing with my patient families visiting my office. My goal is to provide one perspective that might be helpful as we continue to learn more. Meanwhile, I continue to thank the many scientists and researchers who are actively working on this global problem. We are in their debt. 

Want more? Here’s my take on swimming pools and day care during the Pandemic.

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